THE FIRST TIME Lyrics and Music by Haylee Slaughter
Copyright 2007 Haylee Slaughter Music
Written during the worst period of writer's block in my life on Gage's couch! :)
You’ve come so far / you think you’re done
Well bless your heart / we’ve only just begun
Oh darlin’, how can it be?
Still lots to prove / more ground to cover
More rocks to move / from one pile to the other
Oh darlin’, is this happenin’ to me?
You’re so humble / you democrat
Pride makes you stumble / a clumsy acrobat
Oh darlin’, why would that be?
Familiar voices / you turn and squint
Unwise choices / they found your fingerprints
Oh darlin’, is this happenin’ to me?
And I just saw the end of my nose for the first time
And I’m just now feelin’ the warmth of the sunshine
And it looks so good to me
And it feels so good to me
To me
To me
Let’s get to learnin’ / activity
My ears are burnin’ with compulsivity
Oh darlin’, why would that be?
Try to behave / and join the chorus
Echoes the cave / where I lost my thesaurus
Oh darlin’, why’d that happen to me?
And I just saw the end of my nose for the first time
And I’m just now feelin’ the warmth of the sunshine
And it looks so good to me
And it feels so good to me
To me
To me
Cause real life / ain’t on a station
He spoke my name / the hour of my creation
Oh darlin’, how could that be?
I’m getting old / my bones are brittle
It was foretold / I’d die in a hospital
Oh darlin’, will it happen to me?
And I just saw the end of my nose for the first time
And I’m just now feelin’ the warmth of the sunshine
And it looks so good to me
And it feels so good to me
To me
To me
C2007 HAYLEE SLAUGHTER MUSIC
Tuesday, 23 September 2008
Sunday, 14 September 2008
Mondnacht - from Liederkreis, opus 39 by Robert Schumann (1810-1856), written 1840
Uuugggghhhhhhhh. :) These are the lyrics to my favorite piece by Schumann, SO BEAUTIFUL, the music is even more so than the words, because, not in spite of, its simplicity. Please excuse the fact that I don't have German keys on my keyboard (well I probably do but don't know how to use them).
Sometimes, when I'm really still, looking heavenward, my soul recites this in its original translation, in the hand it was written.
Zart, heimlich.
Es war, als butt - der Himmel die Erde stilt ge kusst, dass sie im Bluthenschinimer von ihmi nur traumen musst'.
Die Luft gimg darch die Felder, die Achren wrogten nacht, es rauschten leis'-die Walder, so sternklar war - die Nacht. Und meine See - le apannte weit ihre Flugel aus - flogdureb die stillen Land de als floge - sie mach Hous.
Secretly, tenderly.
-Moonlight.
It was as if the heavens had silently kissed the earth so that the earth had only to dream of it in shiny blooms. The air ran though the fields, the rows of wheat were gently rollling, the trees were gently rustling; thus the night was clear as stars. And my soul expanded its wings, through quiet lands, as if it were flying home.
Fin.
Sometimes, when I'm really still, looking heavenward, my soul recites this in its original translation, in the hand it was written.
Zart, heimlich.
Es war, als butt - der Himmel die Erde stilt ge kusst, dass sie im Bluthenschinimer von ihmi nur traumen musst'.
Die Luft gimg darch die Felder, die Achren wrogten nacht, es rauschten leis'-die Walder, so sternklar war - die Nacht. Und meine See - le apannte weit ihre Flugel aus - flogdureb die stillen Land de als floge - sie mach Hous.
Secretly, tenderly.
-Moonlight.
It was as if the heavens had silently kissed the earth so that the earth had only to dream of it in shiny blooms. The air ran though the fields, the rows of wheat were gently rollling, the trees were gently rustling; thus the night was clear as stars. And my soul expanded its wings, through quiet lands, as if it were flying home.
Fin.
Thursday, 11 September 2008
Things Daddy Taught Me
1) how to field and squarely hit a baseball
2) how to clean a chicken breast (this didn't really take, I still just eat it with my hands)
3) how to LOVE music, down to allowing it to power the ATP that powers the cells in my body
4) how to do cool backflips and dangerous dives into a swimming pool
5) to love books
6) how to bait a hook with a good old-fashioned worm
7) how to pass out in a chair
8) how to decide to not let stuff bother me so much
9) how to spit - one day he said, "Did I ever teach you how to spit?" and made sure I had the proper technique (get the loogie on the tip of your tongue and flick and blow at the same time)
10) how to spit out of a car window moving very fast (still mess this one up sometimes!)
11) why everything should have its place to stay organized
12) to appreciate my athletic achievements and to never take my ability for granted (cuz he never realized his potential, which is why the Natural still makes him cry)
13) that it's okay to cry!!!
14) to love playing with little kids and how to hold a baby
15) to use music as an outlet (I'll never forget the day he brought home my first guitar!)
16) how to give sincerely heart-felt hugs
17) that it's okay to have a boyfriend - "No sense in wasting your time if you know he won't be The One."
18) loyalty
19) integrity
20) to be generous whenever possible
21) to not take crap off of anyone
22) to remember that he loves me no matter what
23) that a Gator football loss really isn't a life-or-death situation
24) financial responsibility
25) to never forget who I am or where I came from, because I am Sam Jr, and wherever he is is home.
I LOVE MY DADDY!!!
2) how to clean a chicken breast (this didn't really take, I still just eat it with my hands)
3) how to LOVE music, down to allowing it to power the ATP that powers the cells in my body
4) how to do cool backflips and dangerous dives into a swimming pool
5) to love books
6) how to bait a hook with a good old-fashioned worm
7) how to pass out in a chair
8) how to decide to not let stuff bother me so much
9) how to spit - one day he said, "Did I ever teach you how to spit?" and made sure I had the proper technique (get the loogie on the tip of your tongue and flick and blow at the same time)
10) how to spit out of a car window moving very fast (still mess this one up sometimes!)
11) why everything should have its place to stay organized
12) to appreciate my athletic achievements and to never take my ability for granted (cuz he never realized his potential, which is why the Natural still makes him cry)
13) that it's okay to cry!!!
14) to love playing with little kids and how to hold a baby
15) to use music as an outlet (I'll never forget the day he brought home my first guitar!)
16) how to give sincerely heart-felt hugs
17) that it's okay to have a boyfriend - "No sense in wasting your time if you know he won't be The One."
18) loyalty
19) integrity
20) to be generous whenever possible
21) to not take crap off of anyone
22) to remember that he loves me no matter what
23) that a Gator football loss really isn't a life-or-death situation
24) financial responsibility
25) to never forget who I am or where I came from, because I am Sam Jr, and wherever he is is home.
I LOVE MY DADDY!!!
Saturday, 6 September 2008
Philadelphia
Here for the first time. Just got back from dinner at Bookbinder's (very fancy place in "Social Circle"...yeah). It was quite good, had the blackened swordfish. It had better'a been good, my friend Mark was 1.5 hours late! :) It's all good, I've known that kid since I was 15! He's an ER doc at Albert Einstein hospital up here now. His girlfriend (a trauma surgeon) Susan is pretty cool too. Caught up on old times. As luck would have it, my phone ran out of power just as I was passing the sports complex! I could've gotten a shot of where the Phillies and Eagles play! Oh welllss.
So it's late. All the other girls in the room are asleep (two Jenns and a Venessa) - I'm that kid who can't sleep for nerves. Touch-judging tomorrow at Pumpkinfest. IN THE RAIN! Woo hoo Hanna!
I dunno. I took 27 pages of notes about referee-ing today. This stuff is pretty hardcore. It's not even about right and wrong; continuity is paramount. Kinda like life. You can dwell on this great thing you're doing or how wrong someone did you, but are you still moving forward?
That is the question of the day. I want to always be moving forward (north and south!) and provide support for my teammates. What else is there?
So it's late. All the other girls in the room are asleep (two Jenns and a Venessa) - I'm that kid who can't sleep for nerves. Touch-judging tomorrow at Pumpkinfest. IN THE RAIN! Woo hoo Hanna!
I dunno. I took 27 pages of notes about referee-ing today. This stuff is pretty hardcore. It's not even about right and wrong; continuity is paramount. Kinda like life. You can dwell on this great thing you're doing or how wrong someone did you, but are you still moving forward?
That is the question of the day. I want to always be moving forward (north and south!) and provide support for my teammates. What else is there?
Wednesday, 27 August 2008
My Perfect Storm
Heavenly Father
Here, in the midst of my Perfect Storm, I will breathe and look up to the hills and remember to be still and know that You are God:
Ecclesiastes 9:11 (KJV)
11 I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.
1 John 5:14-15 (Amplififed)
14 And this is the confidence (the assurance, the privilege of boldness) which we have in Him: [we are sure] that if we ask anything (make any request) according to His will (in agreement with His own plan), He listens to and hears us.
15 And if (since) we [positively] know that He listens to us in whatever we ask, we also know [with settled and absolute knowledge] that we have [granted us as our present possessions] the requests made of Him.
Jeremiah 29:11 (NCV)
11 I say this because I know what I am planning for you," says the Lord. "I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future.
2 Timothy 2:3-7 (NAS)
3 Suffer hardship with me, as a good soldier of Christ Jesus. 4 No soldier in active service entangles himself in the affairs of everyday life, so that he may please the one who enlisted him as a soldier. 5 Also if anyone competes as an athlete, he does not win the prize unless he competes according to the rules. 6 The hard-working farmer ought to be the first to receive his share of the crops. 7 Consider what I say, for the Lord will give you understanding in everything.
John 15:1-17 (ESV)
1 "I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 3 Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. 7 If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples. 9 As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. 10 If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. 11 These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.
12 "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command you. 15 No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. 16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. 17 These things I command you, so that you will love one another.
Amen.
Here, in the midst of my Perfect Storm, I will breathe and look up to the hills and remember to be still and know that You are God:
Ecclesiastes 9:11 (KJV)
11 I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.
1 John 5:14-15 (Amplififed)
14 And this is the confidence (the assurance, the privilege of boldness) which we have in Him: [we are sure] that if we ask anything (make any request) according to His will (in agreement with His own plan), He listens to and hears us.
15 And if (since) we [positively] know that He listens to us in whatever we ask, we also know [with settled and absolute knowledge] that we have [granted us as our present possessions] the requests made of Him.
Jeremiah 29:11 (NCV)
11 I say this because I know what I am planning for you," says the Lord. "I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future.
2 Timothy 2:3-7 (NAS)
3 Suffer hardship with me, as a good soldier of Christ Jesus. 4 No soldier in active service entangles himself in the affairs of everyday life, so that he may please the one who enlisted him as a soldier. 5 Also if anyone competes as an athlete, he does not win the prize unless he competes according to the rules. 6 The hard-working farmer ought to be the first to receive his share of the crops. 7 Consider what I say, for the Lord will give you understanding in everything.
John 15:1-17 (ESV)
1 "I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 3 Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. 7 If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples. 9 As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. 10 If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. 11 These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.
12 "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command you. 15 No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. 16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. 17 These things I command you, so that you will love one another.
Amen.
Monday, 25 August 2008
Making Lemonade
There is much to be learned from conflict and trial. After all, it’s very high pressure that produces diamonds, right? It might not please you to look ahead and see a few dreams, but after THIS DAY is all over you will be a better person for them. Not every day can be a breeze, and going through a rough patch will make you all the more appreciative when you encounter smooth waters once again. Ride out the problems, and it will be smooth sailing sooner than you think.
“Victimism gives your future away.”
ETHOS – model trustworthiness (establish credibility)
PATHOS – seek first to understand (empathize, listen)
LOGOS – then to be understood (presentation and persuasion)
You can’t control life.
But you can control how you deal with it.
“The first step to getting the things you want out of life is this:
Decide what you want.”
-Ben Stein
There’s only us; there’s only this.
Forget regret or life is yours to miss.
No other road, no other way,
NO DAY BUT TODAY!
-RENT
Monday, 18 August 2008
Slaughter Family Gator Football Pre-Game
This was taken from a facebook message I wrote to Meckley yesterday. He's a hardcore Gator, too! IN ALL KINDS OF WEATHER WE ALL STICK TOGETHER FOR F-L-O-R-I-D-A!!! (deffffinitely the BEST tradition in alllll of college football!)
Em and I have actually been sitting in seats 19-22 since we were two years old (or "old enough to sit up" by ourselves). Seat 19 was always where Papa sat. He had a routine for EVERYTHING. We'd leave Oxford around 5 hours prior to kick-off, head up to the Best Ville on 301/441, park around the Union (there were only 2 or 3 lots he was comfortable with), then we'd go eat at Wendy's, where he'd ALWAYS get a chicken sandwich, fries and sweet tea, then go get a chocolate chip cookie at Subway (maaaajor chocoholic). Then we'd sit (with Aunt Ann and Uncle Doug cause they were usually there by then) in the corner on the 1st floor where those comfy couches used to be under that neat sculpture (that's still there, just moved over to the left behind the info desk). Then around 1.5-2 hours prior to kick off we'd go over to the Bookstore (Hub) and sit out in front and wait for the band to go by, which was ADORABLE! and BAD ASS! they do the coolest lil' breakdown man. So then we'd usually follow them into the stadium and sit in the hot fucking sun and watch the team warm up and stretch and evvvverrry pre-game activity. Of course Mr. 2-Bits was the best!!! and, inevitably, every single time, Emmy and I would both BURST into tears when the Gators broke the plane and ran out onto the field...hhheeeeEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRREEEEE COME THE GATORS!!!! and then we'd hug and laugh at ourselves for being so sweet and sentimental.
And that's been our pre-game since we were old enough to sit up by ourselves. (not that we necessarily follow it to the letter anymore, haha, there's generally a stop by a certain Norman tailgate as of late...)
Em and I have actually been sitting in seats 19-22 since we were two years old (or "old enough to sit up" by ourselves). Seat 19 was always where Papa sat. He had a routine for EVERYTHING. We'd leave Oxford around 5 hours prior to kick-off, head up to the Best Ville on 301/441, park around the Union (there were only 2 or 3 lots he was comfortable with), then we'd go eat at Wendy's, where he'd ALWAYS get a chicken sandwich, fries and sweet tea, then go get a chocolate chip cookie at Subway (maaaajor chocoholic). Then we'd sit (with Aunt Ann and Uncle Doug cause they were usually there by then) in the corner on the 1st floor where those comfy couches used to be under that neat sculpture (that's still there, just moved over to the left behind the info desk). Then around 1.5-2 hours prior to kick off we'd go over to the Bookstore (Hub) and sit out in front and wait for the band to go by, which was ADORABLE! and BAD ASS! they do the coolest lil' breakdown man. So then we'd usually follow them into the stadium and sit in the hot fucking sun and watch the team warm up and stretch and evvvverrry pre-game activity. Of course Mr. 2-Bits was the best!!! and, inevitably, every single time, Emmy and I would both BURST into tears when the Gators broke the plane and ran out onto the field...hhheeeeEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRREEEEE COME THE GATORS!!!! and then we'd hug and laugh at ourselves for being so sweet and sentimental.
And that's been our pre-game since we were old enough to sit up by ourselves. (not that we necessarily follow it to the letter anymore, haha, there's generally a stop by a certain Norman tailgate as of late...)
Saturday, 2 August 2008
Willard
Willard isn't a good story, he didn't end well. He was already screwed up by the war before he was given the mission to assassinate Kurtz. Even though he didn't succumb to the same influences that Kurtz did, he certainly felt them and understood the path Kurtz took on his way to insanity/enlightenmnet. Ultimately, he slaughtered Kurtz like a stockyard animal. You are left not knowing if he did it to take Kurtz' place or complete the assigned mission. Reject the system (kill Kurtz and replace him) or abide by the system (kill Kurtz and leave); his only two choices. Either way, he had no where to go, no place he felt he belonged, so perhaps it really didn't matter. Maybe it was this helplessness that tormented him, that he couldn't choose his own path. You aren't given that information in the movie, and there isn't a character similar to Willard in /Heart of Darkness/, at least not in enough detail to make a ready comparison.
Don't be Willard.
Exerpt from email from Lee Brewster
Don't be Willard.
Exerpt from email from Lee Brewster
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