Dreams

4/16/04

I had a dream that I was at the cages picking out a bat and they were all as big, long and heavy as I prefer. Big bats help you cover more of the plate and feeling its weight over your shoulder gives you more confidence that you could Rob Hobbs the crap out of whatever comes your way.

5/27/04

Dreampt I was playing the trumpet in a big brass band (not well.)

08/08/04

Dreampt of a big harvest moon on the horizon.

06/07/06

An angel came to me in the night to let me know I'd never be anybody's wife.
"Just so you know, you're never going to get married."
The rain kept falling and I could hear a baby cry.

3/18/07

I had a dream that Marcia Lou and I were driving down a dirt road in search of a grapefruit tree. We came around a bend and this field opened up to us, all grassy green, with a farm house off to the left. This huge grapefruit tree dominated the landscape. I jumped out of the truck and proceeded to pick the biggest, ripest, prettiest grapefruits ever, so many I couldn't hold them all. The most vivid part of the dream I remember is the giant grin on my face.

This reminds me of one of the most famous passages from The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath:
"I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn't make up my mind which of the figs I would choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet."

This makes me really grateful that I don't take thoughts like these to dark places. People who do that end up gassing themselves with the kitchen stove as their children play in the next room. Choices are good, but I think maybe in this country we have too many. I choose simplicity, humility, and to rejoice for whatever crumb the Rich Man tosses to the dogs. Luke 16:19-31.